Who wants a sexless marriage? Please raise your hand!

I am sure that you are keeping your hand down and maybe even keeping your fingers tightly crossed at the same time, because you know that having a sexless marriage would be hell on earth. It is human nature to want sex, especially if you are married. It is not everything, but it is a part of your togetherness. It plays a very important role in your relationship. A fulfilling sex life can make your relationship worthwhile even faced with its inevitable issues, on the other hand, a non-existent sex-life can have a "mountain-out-of-a-molehill" effect. When there is no love making in the your togetherness, you will see the tiniest cracks and crevices of your relationship,you will tend to magnify it and before you know it, your relationship is crumbling into pieces.

A sexless marriage is like a black hole that sucks the life out of you and your relationship. With sexless marriage, strings of unfortunate events can occur; one of them is infidelity, all sorts of them- financial infidelity, physical infidelity, emotional infidelity and yes, a full-blown second relationship, which can lead to divorce. I am sure that you do not want this to happened in your much treasured- family.

Now, you may not be aware of it, but you might be doing something that might lead to a sexless marriage. How to prevent sexless marriage is about being conscious of what you are doing in your relationship, especially sex-related issues.

Here are some things that you might be doing that are gradually paving the way to marriage without the privilege.

You treat love making as a duty. When you begin to view lovemaking as an obligation, the way you view washing the dishes, or doing the laundry, then you are gradually heading to a sexless marriage. Nobody washes the dishes with passion, or does the laundry with adoration, don't treat making love as such.

You make it as a routine. When you make love every Friday and Saturday after your late night show, then you are heading to a sexless marriage. You sex-life runs like clock works. When there is no more spontaneity, you are slowly killing the fire of passion in your relationship.

You need a wine boost to get you in the mood. Now, when you notice that you cannot get in the mood without a few glasses of wine, scotch, or beer, or all of the above,then you need to reflect on what's bothering you in your relationship and have a sit down session in order to save your love making session.

You only show affection when you want to get some. You know what I mean, you would only kiss, hold your partner's hand or cuddle when you want to do the deed. Keep on doing this act and for sure your partner will get tired of you in no time, and before you know it, you are sleeping with a huge gap in between.

You criticise you partner's performance. If you think that it will lead to improving your sex-life, well you are dead wrong! Never criticise acts of affection if you want to keep it coming.

Ruth Purple
©2011

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