Often times we get to wonder why it's so difficult to maintain a peaceful loving relationship. Why it's hard to keep the fun and frolicking last for even a week. Why it's impossible to have a month long of harmony in the relationship.

There are times when we get tired of feeling empty in an empty relationship.

This is what happens when we fall into hidden traps. It's hidden, because we are unaware of the trap. It settles in our subconscious and manifests in our actions.

Here are the hidden relationship traps that you need to be aware of to help save your relationship.

The Too-Much- Familiarity Trap

When you're with someone for quite some time, it's easy to fall in this trap.

When you slide into this trap, you unconsciously take your partner for granted.

For instance, you don't call when you are running late; you don't say, "thank you" or "I love you" anymore; you boss your spouse around; you don't go out on dates anymore; you don't consult your wife's opinion; you don't hear her out and you put her needs at the end.

Believing that your partner loves you and knows you well enough, doesn't give you an excuse to take your love life for granted. On the contrary it's the perfect excuse why you should value each other.

Taking you partner for granted can become a deadly habit- deadly to your togetherness. It destroys the love, the respect and most importantly, your romantic connection.

When you feel that you're sliding through this pitfall, make conscious effort to save your relationship.

And if you see that your partner making these mistakes, make him/her aware.

The Pointing- Finger Trap

The Pointing- Finger Trap is the most convenient trap to fall in. Some people do it automatically as defense mechanism, while some do it consciously to make the other party guilty.

Either way you need to realize that blaming hurts your union, or sometimes end it.

Save your relationship by taking a step back when you feel like blaming your partner. Practice a lifestyle of self-accountability.

If you're mature enough to get yourself involved in a relationship, then it's just sensible that you learn to be responsible of your own actions.

The I-Am-The- Victim Trap.

This snare is sneaky because you are unaware that you are already trapped and pushing your partner away.

You have fallen from this trap when your train of thoughts runs this way:

• "Nobody understands me."
• "I'm not treated fairly."
• "I'm always taken for granted."
• "I am not appreciated."
• "I know I'm always right."

These beliefs can make you feel defensive and difficult to deal with. You will see yourself constantly arguing with your spouse.

If you feel that you're not being treated fairly or you are not appreciated, talk to your partner about it. Set realistic standards. Keeping it all in will make you bitter and unhappy.

How to save your relationship is all about looking inside yourself first. To see and realize if there are issues within you that is slowly gnawing your love affair to death.

Save your relationship, learn to avoid the traps.

Ruth Purple
©2010

Show All Articles By Ruth Purple