Dating after divorce is quite a bit different than it was before your marriage. For one thing, you probably didn't have kids the last time. You were younger and probably more carefree. You may not have had as many responsibilities as you do now, as well. I know it sounds dreary now but it doesn't have to be. Dating this time around can be just as fun as it was for you in the past. Never forget the point of dating - getting to know other people. A key step in being able to have fun is:

Be sure you know what your boundaries are

It's important that you are real clear on what you're hoping for on a date. If you take some pressure off yourself about finding your new love partner it's much easier to relax and enjoy yourself. Just spend time getting to know the person you're spending time with. If you're more relaxed, then you're more real. You won't be freaked out about saying or doing "the wrong thing."

If you aren't looking for a serious relationship, then don't let a dating partner push you into exclusivity if you're not wanting that. Some people try to push for this too soon because they fear the entire dating process. They want to find someone quickly and then latch on to them so they don't have to keep going through the dating process. If you don't want this, then be strong enough to say so. Besides, why waste your time in a relationship you know is not for you?

Finally, it may have been awhile since you've had sex, so be clear on where you stand on your sexuality so you don't make choices you regret due to hormones.

Most importantly don't forget, It's not about seeking remarriage at this point, it's more about discovering what type of person is a good fit for you at this point in your life.

You may be asking, "What are some other steps I can take to enjoy dating after divorce more?" There are two answers: education and support.

Alyssa Johnson at Remarriage Success
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